MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

What an amazing holiday season it has been! This year was the year that both girls were able to fully enjoy all of the festivities. From several holiday play dates to seeing Santa at the mall. We weren’t sure what to expect with Raegan’s seizures as we recently increased her medicines again. However, praise God that we made it through with no real issues! What a gift in itself! We celebrated with the whole family on Christmas Eve. I had to run out to check the mail several times since some of the gifts were coming but so sad they didn’t show. Oh well, just another reason to see everyone soon! As I was pulling back in the driveway though it was amazing how warm my heart was to see all of the kids vehicles. It meant my home was full with love and laughter. Let’s just say the girls’ had the whole shredding the paper down to a science! Christmas morning we woke to an empty plate where cookies had been left and a dry glass of milk. The tiny candy cane trail that lead from their room to two adorable dolls under the tree. The highlight of Christmas day was when we had dear friends over for a visit and we sat around the table with our birthday cupcakes and Raegan led us in a very loud rendition of Happy Birthday to Jesus. Music to our ears!

In just a few short days we will be entering into a brand new year. We are VERY happy to see some of the trials of 2012 behind us but I would be bold face lying if I said we were jubilant for the arrival of 2013. I shouldn’t say that necessarily, it’s just the fact that we are one month away from surgery. Both George and I looked at each other Christmas Eve night and talked about the reality of what we are about to walk through, together. Thank goodness that although we do not understand, God knows and he has the two of us together to walk this hand in hand. Our heart aches for the unknown of what Raegan will endure however I think that even though 2013 may start with a bump we are going to claim it to be a year of VICTORY! Victory over Epilepsy!

Our deepest gratitude to each and every person that is standing with us as we travel this road. Knowing that we have support in so many forms does bring us peace, comfort and strength. As always we pray for BLESSINGS to you all and may your NEW YEAR be full of hope, peace and LOVE.

Waiting...

So I must say over all in the big picture time is just FLYING by. As I posted before from onset in June, hospital in July and knowing about surgery in Oct we have had a little time to digest things. I guess sometimes I feel numb or matter of fact about the situation, maybe to protect myself from crumbling into a ball in the corner never to return. In my humanness I have been telling myself and others that I'm fine, that yes this sucks, but it is just something we are having to do. The truth? I am not fine. I am not ok. It is not just another day. We are 8 weeks out from surgery. Count that. EIGHT WEEKS. Do you realize how that is going to fly by? I mean we are only three weeks until Christmas Day, then one week to recoup from the chaos, and if you're like me I mentally take advantage of the week of New Year's to 'check out'. So after all of that it will give us three weeks to get all of our things in order for surgery. Heck until just this moment I forgot about our dogs...note to self...make sure someone takes care of the dogs while gone... How do you pack for 15 days in the hospital? I mean yeah I will probably be able to find a spot to wash clothes at least once or twice but that is still a lot of stuff to pack for that amount of time. Although my Christmas list is yoga pants, long sleeve t's, socks/slippers and pj's. It also amazes me how much George and I have brainstormed on how to work meals so we don't go broke eating in the cafeteris. One plus is with him only working 15 minutes from the hospital he is going to bring us fresh fruit and veggies daily from the awesome farmers market they have on campus. Ok enough rambling on that here's the REAL reason for this post...

Two days from now we are spending the day at USCF in San Franisco. We are to be there at 8am where Raegan is going to meet a Neurophyscologist for 6 hours of testing, by herself. I am yet to figure out HOW they are going to keep her occupied for 6 hours BUT since she is the DR. I am sure she knows what she is doing ;) The purpose of this testing is we are wanting to get a SOLID foundation of where Raegan is in her learning, development, speech, motor skills, cognitive learning. As you can imagine brain surgery IS a big deal and we need a good baseline to test against after surgery to see where she could possible have shortcomings and need additonal OT afterwards OR where she excels after surgery with the damaged tissue gone. We prefer the latter!!! :)

After her testing we will then meet with Dr. Auguste, her surgeon. Now this is the real reason for my anxiety. I feel like I have researched, read, talked, and listened to people until I just couldn't anymore but no matter what I have THOUGHT was going to happen this kind man will put it in concrete. We are going to hear IN DETAIL what he sees and how he is going to fix it AND his projected outcome. His projected outcome... I think that is where were are hung up. There is no black and white or gaurentees. We have watched videos of Dr. Auguste and from those he appears to be a very dedicated and gentle man. I have read articles he has written and have sighed with relief but we are going to get to hear and meet this man for ourselveds for the biggest event of our lifetimes. We are putting faith in this man to do brain surgery on our daughter. Well, that is not entirely true. We are trusting God. God has given this man the knowledge, skill and dedication. We are trusing that God will be in every moment of this as He has been up until now.

Please join us over this next couple of days as we go into what seems to be our next 'hurdle', if you will, taking us one step farther on this journey. We love you all and as always BLESSINGS!